Some Jewish friends of mine were very excited the other day to hear that a baseball player they both hated was a member of the Tribe. Maybe he wasn't that bad after all. Sure, he looked like a longshoreman, but if he could hit homers and celebrate Hanukah, then he was all right in their book of life.
They started counting all the Jewish players they knew, and, including the halfies, they almost had enough to field a team. And, oy vey, if they had a time machine to bring Sandy Koufax back, he could be the pitcher! And if there was a surprise Jew in the NHL who was athletic enough to play second base, they concurred, the Chosen People could put together a mighty fine
squad.
"Back in the day," one friend alerted me, "all the best athletes were Jews."
"Yeah, they all grew up playing stickball on the stoop and stuff," the other one said, repeating what he'd heard in Shul.
"No offense, guys," I said, "But I have a hard time envisioning Woody Allen playing linebacker."
They called me a racist. And while I wondered if and how racism applied, they skipped over the NBA and guestimated how many Jewish players were involved in major league soccer, not counting managers.
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