Kiddies. Uncle is an Empire, but our humble little universe all comes together with Uncle Magazine, a real life piece of joy you can hold in your hands. Read it on the subway. Read it on the John. Heck, read it anywhere you motherfucking please.

We're figuring how we're going to distribute this thing, and as soon as the balloons pass through our systems, we'll let you know where to find us. Until then, you can email us at uncle.mag@gmail and we'll send you one in the mail.

And in case you just can't wait to jerk it to this bad boy, here's a PDF of Issue One. Thirty-two pages of naked supermodels, metaphorically speaking. Perfection in the nude. No filters, no filler. The raw.